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Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

12.06.2025 09:52

Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

Trans athlete embraced as California track and field champion by peers while adult activists duel - San Francisco Chronicle

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

World’s most popular TikTok star Khaby Lame leaves the U.S. after being detained by ICE - ABC News

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

Satellite Scanning the World’s Oceans Detects Elusive Phenomena Scientists Say Had "Been Hiding in Plain Sight - The Debrief

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

At 53, Jennie Garth Poses in Her First-Ever Underwear Campaign - instyle.com

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I have a reading level above third grade

Delete Every App On Your Smartphone That’s On This List - Forbes

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

Review: At $349, AMD’s 16GB Radeon RX 9060 XT is the new midrange GPU to beat - Ars Technica

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

Israel launches several attacks on Beirut’s southern suburbs, south Lebanon - Al Jazeera

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

The World Ends with You Director Tatsuya Kando Leaves Square Enix - Anime News Network

I don’t buy bullshit

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I can count

How does it feel to watch your wife get fucked hard?

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

How do you feel cockroach?

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t cotton to rapists

I have complete contempt for fakery

Why can’t my wife just accept the fact that I’m going to cheat?

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I know who the president of Turkey really is

New Study Finds No Evidence of Tension in Hubble Constant - Sci.News

I actually pay taxes

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I understand how hurricane paths work

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I see through liars

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I can read

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says: